How To Live An Unconventional Life

Living abroad as a single parent

While most people in my life seemed to be jumping off the bridge without a second thought, I stood at the edge of the cliff of life carefully looking over and trying to decide if I wanted to jump with the rest of them.

It turns out. Jumping off the bridge with the rest of them wasn’t what I wanted so I chose to live an unconventional life instead. 

First, I had to get super real with myself and so will YOU about what it is you actually want in life.

What DO you want in life?

Get super clear on it all so you can create a plan. Maybe you don’t want that mansion or private chef. 

Maybe you DO want a slow simple life in a different country other than your own surrounded by loving friends.

It is up to you to look deep and define what is that you truly want. 

P.S. I want the private chef!

Keep in mind that what you actually want is the feeling that being surrounded by loving friends, private chefs, the latest luxury vehicle, or the house in Beverly Hills has the potential to bring.

So, first, list out what you want. Then look at each of the things or experiences on your list and name the feelings or feeling that you think each of those things has the potential to bring you.

This will help you get super clear on what it is that you do want which is the feeling that each of the things you have listed has the potential to bring.

When I got crystal clear on what it was that I wanted, I discovered that I truly valued freedom, joy, purpose, and love. These four values became my mission in life.

I no longer desired the life that I thought I was supposed to lead based on societal conditioning and expectations.

I took an active role in designing a life that had meaning and choice.

I know that by creating an unconditional life path, I would be breaking past barriers and pissing some people off along the way because I was refusing to fit squarely in the box built for me. 

living an unconventional life as a single mom life
Hanging with fellow single mommas in Merida, MX

A Warning

Be prepared to have negative nancies pop up. This is normal anytime someone tries for an unconventional life. 

You want to be careful to not let the people who didn’t follow their dreams stop you from following yours. 

Make sure that you only share your dreams with people who are going to uplift you, support you, and give you helpful constructive criticism. 

If you know your grandma is going to tell you what a bad idea it is for you to volunteer in South America with your three children, then why in the world are you going to tell her?

At least wait until you get to South America and then give her a call. 

Now, I know who I can talk to about all my crazy and wild dreams and who I CAN’T

Breaking The Rules

I’ve broken all the rules. I got a divorce, pulled my kids out of traditional public school, sold my possessions, traveled the world with my three daughters, moved to another country, started an online business I love, and discovered happiness along the way.

living an unconditional life
Novie walking with her two friends and her nanny.

Are YOU willing to break the rules?

Living an unconventional life requires you to create your own rules for living.

It also means you need to STOP caring what people think of you and live for yourself.

This might take some time but something that might help in your unconventional life journey is to only compare yourself to yourself and NO ONE else.

With social media it can be easy to get lost in other people’s perfectly curated worlds and start comparing yourself to people who seem to be richer, more successful, prettier, and happier according to their social media post.

This is not helpful. Remember, that the only person you should be comparing yourself to is yourself. Who were you yesterday, a week ago, a month ago, 5 years ago?

Not liking who you are? 

Well, tomorrow is a new day and you can take small steps to start liking the amazing person you already are. Think of each new day as the first day of your life. There is nowhere to go but up.

Define The Rules You’re Going To Live By

You get to define the rules you want to live by. For me, one of the biggest rules I choose to live by is the fact that I can create around things that I love.

I love reading, traveling, writing, and helping single moms live their best lives so I created a business and life around the things I love. 

You can too! Take some time to think about the rules you want to live by. How do you want to live? How do you want to feel each day? Where do you want to be? Who do you want to be surrounded by?

I let others define the rules in my life for far too long. Life gets a lot more fun when you START defining the rules you want to live by!

unconventional life
Hanging with some of my amazing friends in Merida, Mexico!

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  1. Wonderful and inspiring post!! Thank you for following your dreams because you inspire so many others to follow their dreams!! I love how you write that the only people we should compare ourselves to, are our past selves. That’s a very good reminder!

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